Sorry, I ghosted you!

Did yall miss me?? I know, I am slacking on my writing. I am slacking on a lot of things. It seems like yesterday we were celebrating my birthday, and then well – life got in the way. Between being a mom, school, and work, you would think I would have had my hands full. Oh, I did, I also managed to get in some ‘trouble’ too.  Regardless I ended the semester with an A in Pathophysiology and a B in Economics. No bad for someone who has no help I suppose.

The summer was spent with someone who I thought would stick around, and yet they became a huge disappointment. Nothing like feeling like you were being used and lied to, don’t worry that karma that I felt sorry for was just the dose they needed. I also switched jobs in June. I cannot say enough things about my current situation, the load is heavy, but I am so grateful for it, I literally cannot express how happy and thankful I am.

I am starting to resent being single, again. When someone from my past finds out my status, they think it’s an open invitation to ask me what im doing. Why can’t people understand that if I am not reaching out, it is because I stopped caring? You hurt me in one way or another, why should I just let you waltz back into my life? I guess it is a two-way street, and I do need to accept some of the blame, For not using the BLOCK button on my phone. I need to clean out my inbox, my phone logs, and my contact list. Call it an aura pre-fall cleaning perhaps. This would be the perfect time for this, considering that my parents have finally retired and moved to Colombia. Taking them to the airport was probably one of the hardest things I have ever done – getting teary just writing that. Which finding someone to be with has been placed on a whole other level. I now need not only need someone to fill the void, but I now need a new emergency contact and holiday time companion. This will surely not be an easy task!

But in other news, I will be revamping everything in the next couple of days, giving this old thing a facelift. Cheers to the next chapter!

 

XOXO

Ana

January

Well, my January so far has been tremendous. I really have very little to complain about, surprisingly. Nothing, in particular, is super surprising, but all around good. I just can’t believe new years have come and gone. My birthday has come and gone, Which was filled with lots of laughter and smiles. There may have been alcohol involved and possible almost getting kicked out of a museum.  I just wish this horrible weather could be just gone.

With the new year, I am trying to have a positive outlook on things. Mainly because I realized at the end of last year, that being contrary was doing me no good. Most of all, not forcing things. Relationships nor friendships. If you want to hang out with me, then do it, but just like dating – I am not going to beg you. Merely no exchanged should ever be forced, even at work. You should be able to be mature enough to say what you need to say, respectively. Just be mindful of the filter we all carry, and not be like the Chief of State. It is really all about communication and having the balls to speak your mind when you should.

Ok so let’s discuss my birthday for a hot second. Turning 33 wasn’t really on my radar. I usually have a plan and a hotel reservation, this year it was entirely last minute. Thankfully a handful of my friends and coworkers came thru and had a lovely brunch and a great afternoon with me. We went to Liberty Kitchen for brunch and then went to go see the Oscar De La Renta exhibit at the Museum of Fine Arts. I must say I haven’t laughed so much as I did that afternoon, we were absolute mayhem. I also did have a great guy stay with me this weekend, it’s very new but significant, so that’s is as far as I will say. I am super grateful I found him and hopefully, things will last.

For now, it is back to the grind. Keeping up with my diet, which I must say it is going well. School has started, so sadly that is all I will be doing this coming weekend, Economics. And of course, the daily mom duties of laundry cleaning and grocery store runs.

XOXO

Ana

Convenience

Every year my family goes to night Christmas service, its a tradition. Whether we go to the West campus or at Woodway, it is the one thing we do as a family. This year had a lot of the same bells and whistles.  The sermon struck a chord with me, it was the lesson that I’ve learned over the year. If you have relationships of convenience, you are doing it wrong. Relationship wheater they are romantic or not, should not be of comfort. I know so many people that do that. They keep in the same stagnant situation, but they don’t want to change. Well, the change comes eventually. 

As this year horrible year comes to an end, I am more than happy to be sitting at home alone. Yes, I know others may think – how pathetic, but I thought about it, and it’s really not that bad. I get to hang out with the one thing that cuddled me all year. Collected my tears, and never judged me. Binged watched Netflix with me and threw everything it was always there at the end of the day. This is – my bed. I couldn’t think of a better way to start a new year. Comfy, warm and not having to wonder about drinking and driving or that single girl midnight kiss. 

I do have goals for this coming year. I am keeping them to a minimum, and I am going to hold myself accountable on a daily basis. I determined to look and feel the best this year, and I am starting with my health. I already have my meal replacement shake on the counter, I ordered it from Cute Nutrition, and for what I can tell – it’s not going to be that bad. I am also going to take after a friend of mine, and I am going to do 2018 miles this year. To get my mind going, I am going back to school this semester. I am hoping by doing all of this that everything else will follow. 

I am just praying for a good year. A good year not only physically but mentally. With lots of love and beautiful friendships.  For God to continue to bless me, even though I struggle. In the end, it will be the little bit of growth that will get me thru the year. Thank you to all who have supported me, hung out with me, or just sent me a text to check in, it has all been appreciated. May your year be as fantastic as your heart is. Hello, 2018!

XOXO

Ana

fireworks_attendees_618