Well, we are going back to everything that needed to be said. Debrief these wounds that won’t heal until everything has been laid out for the universe to take care of, karma. If you think the following could never happen to you, well, I never thought it would happen to me. Have you ever been violated, assaulted, and embarrassed beyond comprehension? I have. Some situations in life end up being beyond toxic, past the point of rational thinking, and everyone’s reaction to this story is usually the same. Horror, something like this, could happen at work in this day and age.
2020 started with me planning a debt pay-off schedule, even a vacation, and I should have seen warning signs. I ended 2019 by getting into a car wreck. We were coming back from having an excellent New Year’s Eve dinner with my parents. I even had a DD, my dad, because I wanted a drink. Sitting at a red light, we were rear-ended. I can go much into this as I am still fighting the other driver’s insurance. Yes, I have a lawyer, and we have been at this since February 2020, but nothing has been resolved. The nightmare started after just a week of meeting with my lawyer and getting all the paperwork sent to him.
Work is a necessity; it should also feel like a safe space. You have to go there every day. Looking back, there were so many signs of how toxic this would become, but the money was good, and well, it was an excellent opportunity to say, ‘I work in oil and gas.’ The HR director was not the most likable human; most of us didn’t like her. She changed the employee handbook to require pre-employment drug testing; no one knew what was coming. A week later, these people started setting up in a large conference room. Oh, surprise, we were all – the whole company – getting hair follicles tested. I immediately began to search for what I could do to stop this. If you have read any of my previous posts or not, here is a bit of a back story. I have alopecia areata. It started with my pregnancy and has never gone away. It is in my thyroid, and yes, I endured years of Kenalog injections into my scalp. It is so bad it is considered a disability. I am now on lifelong medication.
The next day, the email came thru, and my manager knew this would not go well. He knew how bad it was and the struggles; he had seen the puncture marks. I went and told one of the HR girls that I needed ADA accommodations, and her response was to talk to the HR director. Now before you say anything, I have done my homework. We had DOT drivers, so that would have been the reasonable accommodation – to go to that lab and do the blood work. At this time, I also had three six-inch welts around my head, and yes, I am lucky to have a lot of hair that I was able to hide it. I went to the director and asked the same. Her response is still shocking today:’ You have plenty of hair to sit in the chair.’ I had no option; the only option was to lose my job. So I went back to the conference room, told the girl, and just started crying. No, I didn’t sign the paper. I didn’t consent. I just went and sat in the chair. I just cried, bald like a baby. I couldn’t believe this was happening. The room was full of people. It was horrible. They shave a one-inch by one-inch square where they could find it.
I walked out when the lady was done and sobbed. My co-workers were mortified that HR had done this to me. Most of them knew of my health struggles; their faces said it all. I took what felt like a hike back to my office at the other end of the building. During my walk, it felt like everyone was looking at me, horrified for me. It was so incredibly unfair. I also couldn’t stop crying. I got back to my desk and just tried to calm down. Needless to say, my manager and other people who had worked for the company for a long time took their displeasure of the situation to the CEO; he sent his apologies but never said anything to me directly. For the next several weeks, I just stayed in my office or went out for lunch. Every morning became a real struggle to go in; I wanted to vomit every day when I got to the parking lot.
Lucky or unlucky for me, my child’s school closed that Monday, March 16. I only went back to collect my items from my desk once they laid everyone off. This was incredibly hard to write, but I hope that if you are in the position to make decisions like this over other people, you think twice. I am traumatized by the experience, and there isn’t much to do about it. I did file with the EEOC, but by the time I came for my interview, we were all in lockdown, and they had limited resources. They gave me the ‘Right to sue’; however, I never found a lawyer to take the case.
XOXO
Ana
Everyday Banana 